Yatha Drishti, tatha Srishti!
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Yatha Drishti, tatha Srishti!
Confusions begin when people try to study each other. Even the mobile phones we all hold in our hand all day for years are not sold open. Reading or watching the reviews at times may mislead too. For e.g. China's products getting five stars and apple, four stars is a common thing. Personally, not all highly appreciated books have held my interest. Likewise, trolled films have been my favourites too. Thus I decided not to go by anyone’s opinions when it comes to choosing my man.
Especially, living in a period where doctors' opinions have lost its value as they hardly save a patient, our own opinions these days do not serve us all the time either. This is my opinion and you need not take it.
Evolving into loyal from regular customers who buy products without a demo, we expect a demo from a groom or bride-to-be before finalizing the purchase oops, the holy matrimonial commitment. Suddenly like malls the websites grew for marriages, soon like coffee-shops accumulating the malls, boomed the dating apps. What did we, the actually ‘unfortunate singles’ do? Climb five storeys of showrooms for only movies. Not only that, we all who could afford the best products, have ended up Window browsing! Even those who find it awful to take selfies in the lit up malls are unintentionally doing the same in our so called approaches today. We see her, we see him, then walk further and go back home buying none as we liked none.
While the health conscious, diet conscious, organitarians (I coined it for people that eat only organic food not organ-eaters ahem organ eaters have an old term which is well-known) comfortably buy their everyday vegetables/fruits/food ingredients without seeing, touching, or smelling from online, trusting the print on packets and words on screen, why do we try to squeeze the character or looks of an individual on display like it’s a lemon or cane?
The ones who do not care who prepared their meal, how and who is delivering it, how hygienically it is transported to their address by swiggy, uber eats etc. tries to check the make of a boy or girl from afar! Aren't these contradicting? Aren't we all trusting the products and items proudly, and “testing” the person? We are not grains of rice in a body so that one bite of our behaviour or expression can summarize the entire sack. We were not harvested; we have been ‘delivered’ into this world, at least am sure I was.
All of us want to try most of them before bagging one home, like a dress; treating time as trial rooms! Wow, sounds cool isn’t it? The irony here is if a costume fits us perfectly, instead of grabbing it to the counter, we grow curios about how could it fit! Then, for how many it wouldn’t have fit? Why? Unlike wearing a fabric, when choosing the man or woman, we soon peep out and beckon another human not because he/she is a sales person but just because he was “passing by” the same section minutes ago and we seek his review on the material we have in our hands! This is the formula of the Middle aged Singles when they find a fitting piece or an unfitting piece, both!
Do you realize the pattern here? Why such habit has come into existence? Simple, we have failed to FEEL anymore. Yes, feeling means looking through your own eyes, smelling through your own nose, touching using your own hands and munching using your own mouth. Dangerous truth is that we live BORROWING Senses! We stopped caring how it tasted in our mouth, how it felt when we touched. Politicizing everything, we are married to our leaders and counting votes for the spouse/s. We want brand in people too! We demand a logo, a seal on the forehead, an ISI seal upon the skin in order to share the future and present of a natural, normal, and beautiful life. Should Cupid reincarnate to light up these super brainy, extremely street-smart biiiiig kids?
Everything has become entertainment, if it is not the case then why would someone “watch” another person like he/she is a teaser or trailer? We are not dying in two hours after all, at least to make sense. One cannot play it like a Hollywood editor to impress. I would not go for such humans because I shall think it as purely an edited version where I would not know if the truth were cut or pains. When will humans stop looking at each other as if we are mere thumbnails of movies and web series we scroll up and down on OTT, on a boring day? Do you see that the value of lives have grown so cheap as we only shortlist people, add some to favourite, watch one or two and doze off. Isn’t binge watching a more orthodox exercise/practice than a man or woman looking for a partner?
My grandparents and parents chose their spouses like exactly how today's generation buy a gadget. Women and Men were ‘inside the box’. Mind and body well wrapped. That's why no children knew what 'separated' mean except the word being introduced in Botany; no couple thought a word like divorce will come into their marital world someday.
Today, we dissect the proposals equal to one scanning a gift box and expect ourselves to be surprised when tearing the gift wrapper. When it doesn’t cause any surprise we throw away the toy that was sent our way. Just like ‘being married’ is not a matter of pride, so does being single or shamelessly/morattu single unless we are Kalam or Teresa living for some great purpose! I don’t say being single is wrong. All I strongly say is that there is nothing so right about it either.
One of oldest Indian customs like Child marriage (not a grown old marrying a baby, am not talking about the paedophile culture here) had not destroyed the lives of couples in history like today's adult marriages do according to the current statistics. I do not support Child Marriage but I'd surely advocate each of us to be a child in the process of marriage. Because only the little children know that one can only feel a person and NOT learn a Person which IS the secret of every happily ever after. Otherwise, how you see the match, the match will appear to you in the same way!!
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M Mrithika Santhoshini M.A
Coimbatore
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